Can a woman with an intellectual ability have both her career/business to be very successful and a family simultaneously?

This is an interesting question I received from a female reader. I will give her practical advice.

So first of all, the answer to the question is yes.

In fact I know tons of women who are successful with business while also having a family. However there are certain caveats.

Case 1: If by career you mean working an 8 hour corporate office job and by family you mean husband and children, then this is very hard to pull off.

Simply because corporate jobs stress out and tire women out and eat up all their time, leaving them no energy for their home, children, and husband. You will have a poor sex life, not a lot of time and attention for your children, etc.

You have to keep your overall workload (home + career) manageable so you can actually enjoy life and not get turned into a pack mule who works all day but never enjoys the fruits of his her labor.

This is very hard (if not impossible) for most corporate jobs so a full time corporate career is clearly suboptimal.

When was the last time you saw a high power lawyer who was married and had multiple children? Most aren’t married, or are DINK, and very rarely have a kid.

It’s simply too hard to manage so many things at once, not to mention that your fertile years tend to go by as you build your high power corporate career from the ground up in your 20s.

Case 2: On the other hand, if you can do something that only takes a couple hours (say 3-5 hours a day) and especially if you can choose your own hours, then it becomes much more doable.

This could be some kind of work from home job or any internet based business of your choice (as always I recommend social media, copywriting, or web design to newbies simply because they are low risk and give consistent results).

Ironically, if you are smart and have balls, you will actually end up making more money than that corporate job. This hobby blog makes more money than most people’s full time living.

I am of the opinion that women should do some kind of economically productive work (i.e. something that pays) because people who do not deal with the outside world become airheads over time. Their ability to handle situations and people declines simply from a lack of use.

For this reason, the typical housewife role where you do nothing at all except for household work is also suboptimal in the long run. Not to mention that doing nothing with your intelligence is a waste of god’s gift.

A practical approach goes something like this:

If your husband has a business -> Help him in his business as much as possible. Try to help with things that bring in more money for the business, not by taking over low IQ clerical work.

If you are single or married to a wage slave -> Learn some kind of skill that you can sell on the internet and build your own part-time business.

If you have no balls and just want to become another wage slave -> Get some kind of degree that makes your labor valuable enough that you can work from home and get paid.

A few things to be careful of…

Make sure you do not lose your fertile years to build your career. It’s very easy to turn 28 with a great income (whether from the internet or from your job) and have no husband and children.

You have to prioritize the husband and children first because you have a short period of high fertility that you must capitalize on. The career can be scaled/built later. Make sure you get married on time (sooner is better and modern parents are too stupid to get it).

Find a man with the right mindset. See this shit all the time. A woman with a business/growth mindset ends up being married to a man with a wage-slave/fixed mindset.

As a woman, your life will always be influenced by your husband to one extent or another (the reverse is also true), and if you have a growth mindset and you marry someone with a fixed mindset, things become very suffocating very fast.

You could hit the gym every day and look sexy as hell, but then come home to a fat as fuck husband who only wants to eat butter naan and biryani all day… which will end up compromising your own fitness goals.

Too much success is a woman’s enemy. This is an interesting thing that most women have trouble understanding. Women are hypergamous. It means they are hardwired to be attracted to men who are better than them.

They want a guy who is taller, smarter, funnier, makes more money, older than them, etc. Very few 30 year old women are sexually attracted to an 18 year old coffee shop waiter but the opposite is not true.

If you start making too much money (good problem to have) it can get very hard to find a suitable match for you. A woman with an online business can make $10k a month at 26 while living in India. How many men who are 27-30 make $10k+ a month in India? Very few. So the pool for potential matches becomes smaller and you have to “compromise”.

I’m not sure what the optimal solution for this problem is but this is something for you to think about. That said I doubt most women have the brains and balls to make $10k a month from the internet at 26 so it might be a theoretical problem (I only know 5 women who have achieved it, and I know a lot of women).

So there you have it. There are all my thoughts about this question.

– Harsh Strongman

His brother Tristan Tate has also been arrested on similar charges.

Now, just because you have been accused of something does not mean you are guilty of it.

In fact, the media is known to over-sensationalize and journalists frequently outright lie, and this is why if you ever have to deal with the media, I strongly recommend reading my piece on How To Deal With Journalists.

The media knows that if they keep repeating something over and over again, eventually most people will start to believe it simply out of exhaustion.

They don’t have to show evidence, they just have to keep repeating the same message (they did this to Donald Trump for years during the 2016 election and after).

It is also very easy for women to falsely accuse men of rape and most people are dumb enough to believe them even when they provide ZERO evidence.

So I’m going to fully refrain myself on giving you my opinion on whether I think they’re guilty or not. Why? Because I have no access to any evidence, nor do I know these guys beyond their internet personas, so I do not know whether they are guilty or not.

My opinion is that if they’re guilty, they should spend the rest of their lives in jail, and if they’re innocent, they should be let go and the media should be forced to apologize.

This article is not about his innocence or guilt. This article is about why he being so aggressively pursued by the system (which he calls “the matrix”).

When The System Hunts You, It Is Because YOU HAVE ENEMIES.

The legal system in most parts of the world is very slow and lethargic.

It does not by itself pursue people unless there is someone or something with sufficient POWER who is driving it to pursue that person.

These two guys got cancelled from every platform at once (even their Uber account was shut down), they are being maligned by both sides of the media, and if it was not for a few “free speech” platforms (thanks Elon) and their own popularity, you wouldn’t even get to hear their side of the story.

When the system is constantly attacking you in a coordinated way, this is because someone with lots of POWER is instructing them to do so (look into the owners of the biggest media houses... you will not even have heard their names... this is for a reason).

This is true all across the world. If you do not understand this simple truth, you need to significantly improve your understanding of the real world (Reading Corporate Machiavelli is a good starting point. People who do not read them because they are “long” are simply letting their laziness and lack of work ethic get in the way of their own success).

There are Pakistanis who are raping children in the UK with no one pursuing them aggressively.

There are pimps doing far worse things than whatever Andrew Tate and Tristan Tate are accused of doing, and their crimes are easier to prove, and no one is pursuing them.

There are probably a hundred other islands similar to Epstein Island that we do not know about, and no agency anywhere is aggressively trying to locate them.

In fact, we do not even know who is on the Epstein’s client list (and the only reason we know about Epstein and his list is because the elites are at war with each other, with Donald Trump and Peter Thiel as the champions of the challenger faction).

If these guys do get caught, they can just bribe or lawyer their way out of all of these problems and the system forgets about them pretty soon. They go back to doing whatever they were doing.

Again, if all of this was not already obvious to you, you need to significantly improve your understanding of the real world. Again, reading Corporate Machiavelli is a good starting point.

Andrew Tate’s Biggest Mistake Was Becoming Hated on The Internet

Andrew Tate spent the last few years basically attracting more and more public hatred towards himself.

As I understand, for many years, his business was basically running a webcam agency:

1. Create infrastructure for women to webcam themselves and make money (employees, editors, business advice, recording rooms, computers, accountants, etc.)

2. Take a cut of the money while leaving her with more than she would make by herself without his expertise

3. Recruit more women into the business by going to clubs and parties (find beautiful women making little money and entice them with what they stand to make by working for him)

Basically a standard pimp operation with the girls doing webcam instead of actual sex with customers.

He was making plenty of money doing this in Romania and there are thousands of men like him doing the exact same thing and no one and especially no law enforcement agency cares about it 1 bit.

If the police/system bothers them, they are just bribed away in most of these third world countries.

At some point he decided to enter the internet game and became internet famous.

Internet famous is the worst kind of famous unless you are very good at monetizing it like Belle Delphine who turned out to be a genius businesswoman even though most men’s egos will never let them admit it.

Belle Delphine makes more in a month at the age of 26 than most men do in their life and comes from no real financial or business background. She isn’t especially attractive either.

Yes she’s a pornstar, but so many women are pornstars, and yet almost none of them make her kind of money. Because they lack her business acumen and commercial instinct.

Most men think they are “smarter” than her, yet have no success to show for it (most men are addicted to porn, even though they can quit this nasty habit for good by taking the Live Intentionally: 90 Day Self-Improvement Program).

Anyway I digress.

Back to Tate, his way of monetizing his fame involved basically saying things that piss of 99% of the masses (while trying to market to the 1%).

Whenever you make money, 99% of people will be pissed about it regardless, but in Tate’s case, they were really pissed and he was intentionally triggering them and making them hate him even more.

With all his chess skills, he did not realize that he is basically creating a situation where any politician or agency who takes him down earns A TON OF GOODWILL AND PUBLIC APPROVAL by doing so.

Politicians and agencies know that guilty or not guilty does not matter. They can get the masses to like them and approve of them (win their own fame) by HUNTING Andrew who has basically made himself a public enemy/soft target.

NOTICE THAT THEY WANT TO MAKE A SPECTACLE OF THE ENTIRE THING TO EARN BROWNIE POINTS. IF THE ELITE ACTUALLY JUST WANTED HIM GONE, THEY WOULD HAVE KILLED HIM ALREADY.

The powerful elite can get away with anything, as we saw when Epstein “committed suicide” while the CCTV video of him doing it is erased by accident and the guards who were to watch him were “sleeping” and the prison logs were falsified.

Andrew Tate is being hunted because he’s hated by the masses, not because of anything else he did.

Once the people in power start hunting you, there is not a lot you can do about it.

The best you can do is actually be squeaky clean and hope for the best, but it may or may not work.

If evidence is planted against you, they will have already bought the public to the point that they will believe that it is real by soiling your reputation repeatedly by using their public opinion manipulation tools (the media, including social media).

Again, if the media repeats an accusation loudly enough and often enough, most people will believe it even though no evidence was ever presented.

The people in power control the system, and they can and will keep throwing more and more things at you until something sticks.

And once that happens, they will use it to find more things they can stick you with.

Al Capone famously went to jail for tax evasion and not for being a crime boss.

Again, none of this means Andrew and Tristan are not guilty. (There are videos of him beating women, but also videos of the same women saying it was consensual, but them some people also claim that the woman was 14-17 years old when the beating took place... not sure what to make of it.)

The point I’m making is this:

Guilty or not, if the two had kept their mouths shut, stayed off the internet, and kept doing the webcam business... they would still be free men today.

They could have enjoyed their cars, their houses, their girls, their parties, and continued to live like kings (from the pictures at least, it seems they lived better than kings).

It is only because they did this stupid thing of soliciting public anger, they are being hunted by all sorts of law enforcement agencies and have to watch their backs anywhere they go.

I repeat: It is ONLY because they chose to solicit the hatred and anger of the masses that they are being so actively pursued.

Everyone wants the brownie points of “getting them” and very few people are willing to risk supporting them because they don’t want the mess to spill over to them.

If it wasn’t for all the public attention and anger, no country other than Romania would even care what he’s doing in Romania.

If it wasn’t for all the public attention and anger, they could EASILY bribe their way out of all of this in a country like Romania.

If it wasn’t for all the public attention and anger, he would not be in this situation.

Pissing off so many people was the biggest mistake of his life, for which he is paying dearly by having his life and reputation ruined and spending time in jail.

If he is convicted, the thing that brought him to trial was public hatred and not any of his other deeds.

Keep this in mind. Driving people to visceral anger is a good way to make some money in the short run, but can become suicidal in the long run if you do it to enough people.

- Harsh Strongman

He was starting a business that involved lots of interport exchanges and high seas sales. I suggested to him a corporate structure that made sense for him, and he asked me how much it would cost to set it up.

I told him the number, and he balked at it, and went on his way.

A few days ago, he came to meet me again.

He had received tax notices/demands from 3 different departments at the same time (Income tax, GST/Sales tax, and Customs) and the demand was well over $10M including all the penalties and interest and everything else they had added up.

He wanted help, and I told him that no matter what happened, he would have to pay at least a percentage of the taxes demanded from him, because his business was structured in a way that did attract some taxes.

Had he worked with us from the beginning, he would have had to pay our fees, but he would be set up the right way and would be either outside the jurisdiction of these tax departments, or would be tax exempt.

Because he wanted to save money, he hired some idiot who had no idea what he was doing, and that cost him millions of dollars. This is a little under half a decade worth of profit for him.

There are many people like this guy who are hyper interested in saving money who do not understand (or care) about the details of the thing they actually do… until it bites them.

In the long run, they pay FAR more than they would have if they bit the bullet and did the right thing from the get go.

When I look back at how many people I see with the same mentality, I find it so funny.

Take the products I have at LMM for instance.

How many people continue to live shitty ass lives because they refuse to spend $20 on Live Intentionally?

Live Intentionally is my 90 Day Self-Improvement Program.

There are guys who have:

• Lost 10-20kg in fat

• Gained muscle

• Built discipline

• Gotten better grades

• Quit smoking and drinking

• Quit pornography and excessive masturbation

• Started waking up on time and sleeping on time

• Etc.

All because they spent $20 on the program and did the work for 90 days.

How much better is the rest of their lives because they chose to spend the $20 and do the work? Much better.

Just losing all the body fat alone is a huge win. You look better, girls like you more, you have more confidence, and just feel great.

And then there are people who’ve read me for years who still don’t have the program because they don’t want to spend the $20 on it.

People act like it’s a big amount of money and a huge decision they need to deliberate over for weeks and months.

I have comical conversations with these types from time to time, attaching a recent one here:

From the first question alone, I can tell this person is NGMI because he could have obtained the answer by himself by just checking out the sales page.

The second question confirms it, and you have my final answer that I gave him.

He will never understand why he’s being told this, but I know from experience that what I’m telling him is true.

He is the type of person who will waste months mulling over whether or not to spend his $20 on this program and in the end just forget about it and go back to his regular life.

If he is reading this, he will perceive this as an “insult” even though it is just a statement of fact.

The sales page has 100s of text reviews from verified customers, 13000+ sales, almost 500 5 star reviews, and the value of the product is very clear.

It’s not “expensive” even though it should be (many of the bonuses I give along with the program cost more than the program itself when purchased separately).

I deliberately keep the price of this product low and affordable because I want EVERYONE to be able to benefit from it. Many of my customers for this product are from poor countries in Africa and I want to help everyone live better (these emails are free!).

My point is… how much fitter and healthier would people like this be if they just got and did the program?

He would lose fat and gain muscle. He would be much more disciplined, have more willpower, and be a changed person.

And yet his stinginess has cost him all of these things. He is the same person he always and always will be.

He saved his $20, and he can invest it in the stock market and turn it into $60 by the time he retires.

He can then perhaps use the $60 on a knee replacement that he will need because he never lost weight, or use it on something else he will have to spend on as a result of his own poor habits that he never fixed.

The same is true of The Art of X and my other products.

There are guys who will email me asking for a discount, or tell me that they’ve been meaning to get it for months… and all I can do is laugh.

It’s one thing to not want to build an online business or to not want to do it with X.

But if you want to start an X based online business… do you know how much money you’ve already lost by not getting and executing The Art of X the moment you saw it?

You could already have an account with many followers and a product or two for sale by now. You could have made back what you paid for it already.

All the dillydallying and waiting and never actually getting started cost them not only the money they could have made, but also the network they could have already developed and opportunities they would have had if they had had more balls and took action.

And I’m not telling you this because I want to manipulate you into buying something from me.

This is a hobby for me and despite that I’ve been a top seller on Gumroad for over 6 years now and getting someone to buy 1 book from me is not going to turn me into a billionaire.

I’m telling this to you because this is a mistake many men make.

They wet their panties over the upfront effort/price (I use the term panties because such men are usually pussies in general and many have to “ask the wife” to go out alone with their friends) and end up paying far more in the long run.

They are too stupid to understand the value of boldness and that opportunities multiply as they are seized, and that most opportunities are time bound (if you do not take them, they lose value over time).

For example, if you lose weight when you are 22 and keep it off, you are far better off than if you do it at 42.

Why? Because you can’t fully unclog your arteries or reverse the damage your knees have taken from the years of you being a fatso.

Making lots of money when you are young is far more valuable than making big money when you are old. You can do much more with money in your youth.

By being late to the opportunity, you pay a cost for it, and often the price is steep.

However, many people never realize this and their stinginess keeps costing them results and opportunities.

Ironically, these people think they are very smart because they saved the upfront costs and think they are outsmarting everybody.

– Harsh Strongman

Read this piece carefully because I’m going to tell you the simple solution to avoiding a lot of pain and suffering in your life.

Let me start with the first two rules of human nature:

1. People are how they are.

2. People will be how they will be.

I will do a full post on this topic in the future, but for now, you need to understand that you cannot significantly alter people’s personality traits.

If someone is highly neurotic, they will continue to be highly neurotic. You can teach them some ways to manage their neuroticism, but you cannot take it out of their personality.

If someone is highly introverted, they will continue to be introverted. You can help them open up and be more social, but they will never become a naturally extroverted person.

People are how they are and there’s not much you can do about that.

Women are like cars. You can improve the tires, fine tune the engine, learn to drive better, and fix some dents. But you cannot turn a sedan into an SUV (and vice versa).

Often in your dating and romantic life, it becomes clear that the woman you’re dating is not the woman you have any long term future with.

This could be for a variety of reasons like:

• Her not being as smart as you like (not much to converse with her)

• Her having a bad personality (argumentative, highly neurotic, anger issues, etc.)

• Her having very low libido (this is a huge negative if you are a red blooded man like me)

• Her not caring much for her health and thus gaining weight and looking like a slob (in other words, taking you for granted)

• Or whatever else. Maybe she was just good for a casual relationship or a FWB setup but she’s not wife material. Whatever.

What men typically do is that EVEN AFTER they realize that there’s no future, they STILL STAY in the relationship out of things like sunk cost and sentimentality.

Either that or because they are afraid that they will not be able to find a different girl. In this case, MUST improve your attractiveness to women and improve your game because that’s the thing that’s holding you back from bettering your life.

They try to change the person and hope that they’re able to make it work.

This is a mistake.

You have to understand that time is limited. It’s your most valuable resource and you need to be protecting it from getting wasted.

If you spend 1 extra year in a relationship with no future, that’s a full year that you will never get back. It’s a mistake.

If you find yourself in a relationship with a girl you already have realized will not work out, CHANGE HER. Break up with her and find a different girl.

It’s better for you and better for her.

Breaking up sucks, but you know you’ll need to do it eventually anyway.

Get it done sooner than later so you can move on with more productive relationships with more compatible women.

– Harsh Strongman

P.S. The same thing applies to everything including your business or career. If what you do doesn’t pay as much as you’d like, don’t waste time and change it.

Start an online business (I recommend The Art of X), or find a different job, or build some kind of supplemental offline income stream. Whatever.

The last thing you want to do is waste 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, or more years on something that will not take you to the promised land.

How women define masculinity

If you ask women, this is what “masculinity” means according to them:

• “You PROVIDE. Period.”

• “Work yourself to the bone”

• “Sacrifice EVERYTHING”

• “You don’t get to be tired.”

• Do everything in your power to make sure your woman doesn’t have to choose between electricity bills and groceries

• Get up at 4 am and come home at 7 pm from work

They may use different terms and more ambiguous language but this is what it eventually boils down to.

But guess what?

Women’s definition of masculinity is actually the definition of CHATTEL SLAVERY.

Slaves have to work all day entirely sacrificing their life to provide for their ungrateful masters.

Slaves have to sacrifice anything that might bring them pleasure.

Slaves are obligated to provide when they don’t want to.

Slaves have to work themselves to the bone.

Slaves don’t get to be tired.

Women (gynocentric society in general) define masculinity as you working at the expense of your happiness so that they are well provided for.

They do it to manipulate and shame men into giving them things (money, comfort, time, attention, sexual exclusivity, etc.).

To put it clearly, women’s definition of masculinity is a shaming/manipulation strategy to get men to work for their benefit and part with the fruits of their labor.

This definition of masculinity has been injected into mainstream culture by TV, media, celebrities, schools, and the like.

ANYTHING that brings happiness and pleasure to men that does not benefit women (or corporations) is branded unmanly or boyish.

Or at the very least something you are told you should feel guilty about “indulging” in them.

Here are some examples of things men like that are “childish” because it does not serve the interests of women:

• Dating multiple women without commitment

• Hanging out with the guys without the presence of women

• Spending time on the internet learning about niche topics that interest you

• Playing sports or video games or other activities you enjoy after you are done with the day’s work

• Using money for your own pleasure and hobbies instead of funding the woman’s lifestyle (for example, spending 3 months salary on a ring for her is fine but spending the same amount on hobby equipment you enjoy is childish)

• Etc.

On the other hand, things you do for the benefit of women are considered masculine and “responsible”:

• Helping with household chores

• Being in a “monogamous committed relationship”

• Working two jobs so the woman doesn’t have to work

• “Stepping up” to be the step-father of the spawn of a single mother

• Giving her most of your time and only rarely going out with your friends

• Not spending money on your hobbies and interests and instead funding her life (buy her expensive clothes, jewelry, etc.)

• Doing things that the woman enjoys like watching romantic movies, shopping, television, etc.

• etc.

Sadly most men are stupid (and desperate for sex and female approval) so they buy into the charade and become the woman’s workhorse.

What is real masculinity?

Read carefully because I’m about to reveal to you something that is going to change how you think:

REAL MASCULINITY MEANS DOING WHAT YOU WANT.

This has and will always be true masculinity. Women and gynocentric men (men who are desperate for women’s approval and praise) do not get to define masculinity for us.

Real masculinity is being the master of your own self and doing what YOU want.

If you want multiple girlfriends and sidechicks, then so be it.

If you want to have one woman and provide for your family, then so be it.

If you want to abandon your family and do something else, then so be it. Yes I am aware hearing this makes beta males and gynocentric men REALLY mad (They have had “be responsible” hammered into them).

If you want to be rich and successful and sacrifice to get there, then doing that is manly.

If you don’t care about success and want to play video games all day, then do that. Not that it’s going to lead to great long term outcomes, but it wouldn’t make you less of a man. Not caring about wanting to be successful and rich is still your choice. (“If I was not Alexander, I would be Diogenes.”)

Ironically, by women’s definition, neither Alexander nor Diogenes would be considered manly. Because neither men did things that served women’s interests.

One was a conqueror who conquered for his own ambitions, and the other was a man who lived in a barrel.

The point is that you are not “obligated” to provide for anyone you don’t want to provide for. You are not obligated to live a life you don’t want to live. Your life is yours to live and enjoy, not to be spent in servitude of others.

REJECT the idea that you have to be a pack mule and make sure you give women a comfortable existence (or somehow risk becoming a fake man).

But but but aren’t men supposed to provide for their families?

Are we not shirking our duties when we say a man can choose not to provide for his family? Haven’t historically men always provided for their families?

This is where gynocentrism muddies the waters and tricks you into becoming a slave.

What is the difference between a slave and a man? CHOICE.

A gynocentric mindset turns you into a slave who MUST provide. There is no element of freedom or choice.

A man on the other hand has the choice to provide for his family. You provide for your family because you like your family and want them to do well in the world.

If for whatever reason that fundamental assumption changes (i.e. you no longer like your family), you are not obligated to provide for them.

That is the difference between real masculinity and gynocentric slave masculinity.

Look around you and see how many men are stuck slaving their days away providing for women who they do not like:

• Women who disrespect them

• Women who are lazy and do nothing

• Women who cheat on them (yes, he “forgave” her)

• Women who have given them nothing but a dead bedroom for years

This is the majority of men. They are essentially enslaved by the woman. Because they don’t understand what it means to be a man.

Under real masculinity, the man will LEAVE and find a different woman (or women) that better serves his interests. He would have the choice to do something else.

Under gynocentric slavery, they are stuck serving and providing for the woman even if the woman does not do her part of the deal. You will be told that you need to keep providing for the woman and stay monogamous to her even if you have a dead bedroom.

It is slavery because the woman feels ENTITLED to the man’s work and sexual exclusivity and the man is made to feel OBLIGATED to provide for her even when he gets nothing in return.

You are NOT obligated to provide for anyone you do not want to provide for. Do not let them make your own mind your barrier to your freedom and happiness.

Do Not Be Addicted to Female Approval

In life, if you want to be happy and free, you have to break free from being addicted to seeking female approval and praise.

Being addicted to female praise will destroy you for the simple reason that all female praise eventually boils down to how much you benefit women at your expense.

At first you will lose your ability to speak freely. Women will clap for you when you speak feminist viewpoints and boo you when you say anything that might be construed as “sexist”.

Like a lion in a circus, you will be trained into saying things like “men and women are equal and have equal capabilities”.

Then, slowly but surely, the praise will be used to reward you for indulging in beta male behavior and providing for women (behaviors I described above in the article).

It will turn you into a walking and talking joke of a person who says men and women are equal and that men have no authority over women, and at the same time knows he needs to provide for women or the praise will be taken away.

Do you know what someone with responsibility for providing for someone without authority over them is called? A slave.

This is the end result of being addicted to female praise. You become a slave. And all they had to do was give you some attention, clap for you, and praise you for being “responsible”.

In the meantime you get to “work to the bone” to provide them with useful material resources and take care of their emotional needs for free.

To add insult to injury, 90% of the time the woman isn’t even sleeping with the guy being played like this (How many modern marriages are sexless? Just look at the amount of internet pornography being consumed by married men for your answer).

Remember what women praise in men is very different from the traits of men they open their legs for.

It is the nice guy vs jerk situation all over again.

Women say they want nice guys. They praise nice guys and tell them that they are perfect. They tell them how much they wish all the jerks were like them.

But then they go and sleep around with the men they say are jerks. That’s who they open their legs for and who they cherish inside them.

Only to come back to the nice guy friend and complain to him about how badly the jerk treats her.

“If only they were like you…”

The nice guy always wonders “but what about ME? I’m exactly what you say you want” and lives in frustration not realizing that women’s stated beliefs are different from their actual beliefs.

Sidenote: if this is your life situation, I can guarantee that you can completely change your dating/married life if you read The Book of Pook Series and the Seduction Bible. It will be the best investment you will ever make in your life.

Why are women attracted to jerks? Why are they not attracted to the nice guys they say they want?

Because jerks are masculine. They do what they want.

They are not looking for female approval or praise.

On the other hand, the nice guy is not masculine. He does things for female attention and praise. He is a spiritual faggot.

From the woman’s perspective, the nice guy is their ticket to a comfortable life after they enjoy their 20s getting fucked by men like me. The nice guy is their backup plan if nothing works out. He is the last choice.

The main plan is to find an exciting masculine “jerk” and “fix him” and marry him. When that fails the woman hits 28, the backup plan is triggered and they want a man who is “responsible”.

I slept with so many women who are now married to some nice chump with a job and a degree simply because I did not care what these women thought of me. I did what I want and that is a quality highly attractive to women.

Some of these women were in casual relationships with me, some were in relationships with other men but slept with me anyway, and some I just had on and off friends with benefits relationships with.

Read: How to Get a Friends With Benefits (FWB) Relationship

The beta males who have swallowed the “man is a provider” gynocentric narrative hook, line, and sinker do not have any understanding of the fact that they’ve gotten played.

The women they are providing for are much smarter than them. She had her fun and is now using them to live a nice and easy life in something like retirement.

All she needs to do is praise the chump when he does good behavior (provide for her) and shame him when he does bad behavior (anything that does not benefit her).

Like the parasite who happily saps nutrition from the host giving nothing in return till the host is dead, this game of the woman using praise and shame as reward and punishment to make the man work for her benefit continues till he is dead from the toll.

Until next time.

Your man,

Harsh Strongman

After I was born, my mom and dad decided to move to the city so that I would have more opportunities in life.

I grew up in a chawl, which is better than a slum but worse than a ghetto.

I spent the first 16 years of my life living in chawls, and most of the people who lived there were on the borderline poor or lower middle class.

There was a lot of normal families like us staying there, but also a lot of drug users, prostitution houses, and other negative elements that you can expect.

In fact some of my childhood friends were children of prostitutes, although I did not realize this at the time. They came from houses that had only women, and one female matriarch that led them all (the matriarch was always fat as fuck for some reason and you could always tell who the leader was by her weight).

I never realized that these children I was playing with were children of prostitutes until much later in my life when my mother told me.

Suddenly it clicked for me that all of them thought that their dads had “died” when they were little and to this day I am a bit annoyed at myself for not being able to figure it out on my own (my mom and dad said they never told me because I would have used it to insult them if I had a fight with them, and that could potentially get me violently beaten by their groups or worse, killed to make an example).

Anyway, I digress.

What I want to talk about is the reason why many of these people (even the normal families) very rarely make it out of their lower class existence.

Bum Mentality

You would think that the actual reason why these people never improve their lives (at least financially) is because they lack high paying skills and education, but that’s not actually the full story.

The true problem is not a lack of skills and education. You can acquire skills and education.

In fact, ALL of these people have smartphones and internet (they are both very cheap in India) and can learn whatever they want with some effort and dedication.

Now I’m not saying that they can all open online businesses like with The Art of X and make internet money, but they CAN learn enough of something to get out of poverty.

For example, a guy I know who used to live in the chawl is a gym trainer. He used the internet to become a legitimate expert on training and was able to get himself a much higher paying job at a much better gym by increasing his skills using the internet.

He went from making ₹10,000 ($100) a month to making ₹60,000 ($600) a month in a few years. It sounds small to you and me but it was life changing for him and his family (imagine being able to afford decent food and housing).

So while it would be unreasonable for them to build online businesses from their current starting points, it is entirely reasonable for them to learn some kind of new skill that can improve their life situation.

But why do so few of them ever do it?

The reason is BUM MENTALITY.

What is Bum Mentality?

Bum mentality is when people accept their shitty existence and stop making real effort to improve their life situation.

They just go with the flow and cope with their shitty reality as much as possible.

To put it in simpler terms, bum mentality is a combination of high apathy and low ambition. You get “stuck” and never make non-linear progress.

It is VERY VERY common with middle class people because they become comfortable with what they have but lack the balls and commercial instinct to take risks.

In these chawls I grew up in, it was so common that 999 out of 1000 people could be described as having bum mentality.

Why Am I Even Talking About This

Of course the meta point of this article is to help you spot what bum mentality looks like, for 2 reasons:

1) If you spot it in yourself, you know that you need to eradicate it. Bum mentality can easily steal 10, 20, and even 30 or 40 years from your life.

You will just keep getting older and make 0 progress in life (except the linear progress that everyone makes). You will miss all the step functions that your life could have taken.

2) If you spot it in others, you know that investing time to build that relationship further is a waste of your time. The person will get nowhere in life and will take more from you than he will ever have to offer you.

In other words, this will turn out to be a host-parasite relationship in the future, where you are the host and they are the parasite. The faster you can get out of this, the better off you will be.

How to Spot Bum Mentality

Here are the commonalities in all of these people who never made it out of the chawl:

1) They watch A LOT of television.

They ALWAYS buy the best and biggest TV they can. Having a big TV is almost a status symbol.

People compete on who has the biggest TV, and most of these people could easily watch an upwards of 4-5 hours of TV every single day (TV includes YouTube and Netflix by the way).

They know what happened in the latest episodes of all the popular shows, and will get together with their friends to talk about the characters.

Instead of investing their spare time to learn things (e.g. by reading books), they invest it in watching entertainment.

2) They know all about actors and sportsmen.

They follow celebrity gossip and can tell you what every actor is up to.

They know the performance of cricketers and can tell you how they play from memory.

They are very invested in these cricketers and any insult or praise of their favorites will be interpreted as insults and praise for them.

Instead of living and succeeding in the real world, they live vicariously through celebrities and sportsmen and think that their favorite cricket or football team winning is equivalent to them winning.

3) Alcohol and substance abuse.

There is a lot of substance abuse, and many people spend a lot of their off work hours drinking cheap alcohol to make themselves feel better.

Alcohol is often more than 20% of their disposable expenditure.

Instead of spending their money on acquiring new skills, they spend it on escaping reality by using alcohol and drugs.

By the way, if you are addicted to smoking or drinking or pornography, and want to quit for good, get yourself a copy of Live Intentionally: 90 Day Self-Improvement Program. This will be the most important small investment of money that you will make in your entire life.

4) They cope with reality by using politics.

They blame their lack of success on external factors, usually politicians and the government.

If only their favorite politician was elected, everything would be fixed and they would become instantly successful.

They are poor because the rich are stealing from them. Or because the government isn’t doing enough to employ them. Or because the politician in power is not doing enough to “promote the locals and keep the outsiders in line”.

Instead of being accountable for their own life, they hold other people responsible for the state of their life.

5) They have a general hatred of ambition and success.

If someone around them displays ambition to improve their life and is becoming better than them, he will suddenly become a pariah.

People will talk badly about him behind his back and try to sabotage him wherever possible to “bring him back into his place”.

They are not Machiavellian enough to hide their envy, so they will show their displeasure with sarcasm.

For example, if you are doing well, they may start calling you “Richie Rich” and use it as insult/shaming phase. If you are good in studies, they will sarcastically call you a “Scholar”. (Almost as if you are supposed to feel insulted by this.)

Instead of being inspired by other people’s success and copying and learning from it, they are generally envious and resentful of it.

6) They REALLY care about their birthday.

This was always weird to me but these guys often really care about birthdays. Their own, their wife’s, and their children’s.

They will spend quite a bit of cash to celebrate birthdays… I have never understood why. And you see this in all loser populations, not just broke chawl people.

For example, women who come from money and don’t ever have to improve themselves or work for something (i.e. they can live a comfortable and unproductive life) are also obsessed with celebrating their birthdays.

Instead of celebrating achievements, they celebrate the fact that they were born.

Again, these are general trends and do not apply to every single person.

That said, bum mentality is the culprit that keeps people from rising up in life.

Eradicate it.

– Harsh Strongman

1. The group of people you are trying hard to fit in with will become so irrelevant you won’t even accept a meeting with them if you work hard and surpass them all.

2. Stop watching TV. Stop getting high. Don’t consume entertainment. Anything that gives you a dopamine hit without having to do any work is an enemy. You are being milked like a cow.

3. Read as many books as you can, and learn as much as you can while you are still young. When you’re young, your brain finds it much easier to learn and hold knowledge. This is the time to build a good intellectual foundation.

4. Get 1 bitcoin while you still can. This guarantees that you’ll be in the top 0.2625% of the population in the future.

5. Things like depression and anxiety only affect the inferior and weak. If you live a good life with healthy food, exercise and sunlight, and family – you won’t have these problems.

6. Journalists are not your friends and they are not paid to tell you the truth. The idea that the media is the friend of the people is a lie. Media companies are owned by a few wealthy elites and the papers print what they want them to say.

7. You can make a lot of money online. More than you think. Eventually, all of the money will be online. It’s up to you to figure out how you can get a slice of the pie.

8. As far as nature is concerned, the purpose of life is to have lots of children and ensure their survival. Everything else is a side-quest. Any ideology that involves you not having children is a false path.

9. Looking cool is an illusion. 99.99% of the people you’re trying to impress don’t care about you. If you die today, who will still miss you 10 years from now? Only your mother and father. (This is also why you should stop being shy.)

10. Use your 20s to work hard and set yourself up for the rest of your life. Start a business, find a good spouse, get jacked – and you’ll be miles ahead of most of your peers in your 30s.

11. Take care of your body. Eat a lot of protein, supplement with fish oil and vitamin D, and don’t eat vegetable oil. Remember that you only have one body and it has to last you longer than you can imagine.

12. Do not be afraid of separation. You were born alone and you will die alone. All the people who you know and love and hate will only be around for a small portion of your life. This is just the nature of existence. The birds all sing on the same branch in the morning, and go to different ones at midday.

13. Spend more time with your mother and father, because you’ll wish you did once they’re dead.

14. You will get infinitely more happiness from your family than you will from your career. This is why the most important decision you’ll ever make is who you marry. Don’t rush it.

15. If you can’t learn from it, earn from it, or fuck it – you should probably get rid of it.

16. When someone on the internet calls you sexist, you do not start explaining how you’re not sexist. You claim to identify as a woman and call them misogynists. Fight fire with fire; never bring a knife to a gunfight.

17. Male aesthetics comes down to having low body fat, big shoulders, good posture, well fitting clothes, and being well groomed. You’re not ugly, you just need to lose 10kg of fat.

18. As a man, your value will keep going up with time. You will get richer, more connected, and wiser. As a woman, your value will go down with time, and start to rapidly decline after 28. Your looks will fade and your fertility will reduce. Set your priorities accordingly.

19. Build a life worth living. Get hobbies, travel, experience more things, and learn as much as you can. Being boring is a choice. So is being bored.

20. Never hesitate to spend money on books and courses from people who are experts in their fields. It’s very funny that people hesitate to drop $100 on an ebook written by an industry expert, but don’t think twice before spending $100 on drinks, and $100k on pointless degrees taught by people who have achieved nothing in life.

21. When you’re young, you argue and try to correct people. When you’re wiser, you learn to smile and agree.

22. If you lack confidence and self-esteem, learn to fight. Boxing, wrestling, or anything that involves sparring. It’ll fix your testosterone levels and teach you that you’ve got nothing and no one to be afraid of.

23. Singing religious songs and going to temples will do nothing for you spiritually, just like how taking diet pills will do nothing for your weight.

24. If someone else owns your house (landlord) and your source of income (job), you are not a free man.

25. Just because someone is old does not make them wise. Most old people are just old, not wise. Wisdom comes from experience and reflection, which only a few people acquire in a lifetime. Almost everyone gets older, though.

26. The most important skill in life is sales. Everything is sales – from selling things on the internet to getting a date to interviewing for a job. Learn copywriting, body language, and how to talk to people.

27. More tyranny comes from the weak than from the strong, because the weak cannot handle power.

28. You will grow older sooner than you think. “The days are long but the decades are short.” Remember this before you decide to postpone your dreams and ideas to tomorrow. Never forget that sooner or later, you are going to die.

29. No one will believe in you until they see that you’ve already made it. Then they’ll act like they always knew you’d make it. Stop looking for support, start building things.

30. Everything eventually boils down to mindset. If you see problems everywhere, the problem is you. No amount of resources can ever fix a bad mindset. Nothing is ever perfect, you just have to find a way.

31. The easiest way to reduce your stress levels is to become financially independent. This is because the biggest source of stress for most people is next month’s rent and bills.

32. All your rights only exist if you can enforce them. Otherwise, they’re just guidelines. If you want to have complete control over a population, you have to disarm them first.

33. Don’t give up too soon. The only way out of hell is through it.

34. Women will eat up your time and attention if you let them. You will spend time talking to her, thinking of her, texting her, and dealing with her emotions. Until you’re satisfied with how much you’ve achieved in your life, don’t get into serious relationships.

35. The more you speak, the less you will be respected. Only scarce things have value. If you’re always around and always willing to help, your presence and effort will be taken for granted and will have no value.

36. Never spend time worrying. Deal with life as it happens. If things go south tomorrow, you will deal with it with the resources you have with you at that time. Just like you did yesterday.

37. Only marry a virgin. The more partners she’s had, the higher your chances of divorce. Divorce laws are rigged against men, so make sure you learn how to protect yourself as a man in a divorce.

38. Society tells men to “do what’s right”, and tells women to “do what’s right for you.” The truth is that society doesn’t care about men, and you should do what’s right for you too – even if society calls it unethical, immoral, or unfair. You must have your best interests at heart, because other people don’t.

39. Look into their eyes when you talk and look at their mouth when they talk.

40. The least paying clients will give you the biggest headaches. The Pareto principle is true.

41. If a cryptocurrency isn’t being used by criminals, you probably shouldn’t be using it either.

42. If you want good social skills, read How to Win Friends and Influence People and interact with lots of people. It’s about practice. If you spend your entire day in front of your computer, you cannot expect to have good social skills.

43. She will stay beautiful for 10 years, but she’ll stay intelligent forever. If you have to choose between beauty and intelligence, go with intelligence.

44. Use butter and ghee. Not vegetable oils. There’s a reason why people have started to get heart attacks in their 50s and 60s – these seed oils are to blame.

45. When you chase women, you get neither the woman nor your dreams. When you chase your dreams, you get both your dreams and women. Sadly, most men chase women.

46. Your network matters. Being a one-man army will only get you so far. Build your network. The best way to do this is by increasing your own value, so other high-value people are willing to associate with you.

47. Be controversial. As long as you’re not doing anything illegal, being controversial is just free publicity. If you’re afraid of being controversial, you will probably not do well in business. You need more spine. Remember, god made feminists so that Life Math Money, the #1 Self-Improvement Resource for Men, can grow faster.

48. Building muscle is not just about working out. You also need to eat right and sleep right. If you have a good training program, get enough sleep, and eat enough protein and calories, it’s impossible to not gain muscle.

49. Never engage in negative gossip. Only say positive things about people behind their backs. Word gets around to them. This is how you build supporters.

50. People waste one day at a time and wonder where all the years went. What are you going to accomplish today?

I haven’t cried hard in a long time.

It is rare for something to bring me to the point of tears, and while I may shed a tear or two when I come across someone in a lot of misery, it is extremely rare for me to have a torrent of tears.

As a man, you simply do not have the luxury to not be able to manage your own emotions.

Women and children can cry at will, but a man? It is simply seen as weak, and this is why men rarely cry, or if they do, they do it in private.

A man who cries frequently in public is simply seen as pathetic.

I was in Indonesia for a few weeks for a vacation and for business (depends on who’s asking, the tax man is given a different reason from everyone else), and when I came back, I noticed that one of my websites was dead.

It was because of a technical snag and I quickly fixed it and bought it back up.

This was the site that I had set up for my friend Jon Anthony’s old blog Masculine Development.

Jon was a friend of mine who had everything going for him, at least on the surface.

He was making ~$50k a month, was good with women, had youth and freedom (he had an online business that allowed him to travel anywhere he wished... and he did), and he was also extremely healthy and fit.

I had met Jon many years ago when he purchased The Art of X from me and reached out with some questions. He was very skilled with marketing, and within a year he was pulling $10k a month from X.

Full disclosure: This is an outlier result because Jon had a lot of prior experience with writing. The median user with no prior experience who applies the guide is doing ~$3k a month after a year, and it takes 3-5 years to get to $10k a month.

Over time our friendship developed and I helped him build and market his own products. Everything was going well, and we used to speak regularly.

Then one fine day, he completely stopped responding to my messages and did not pick up any calls. I thought nothing of it, and assumed that he must be travelling somewhere with little or no reception.

Then about 2 months went by, and a mutual friend reached out to me and sent me a link to his obituary.

It turns out that he had committed suicide. Why? I don’t know. He had money, women, personality, physique… I have no idea what went wrong. I can speculate, but I do not know for sure.

I was devastated at the news, and I remember I cried for a week.

Why did he not reach out to me before? I could have helped him. I would have happily flown to him to help him, and he knew that. And yet he went ahead with his decision.

When I found out, I knew I had to act quickly if I wanted to preserve his website and his work. I had the password “in case of unforeseen events” just like this and made a copy of his website.

Unfortunately, Jon never gave me his domain password, so I had to host it on a different domain masculinedevelopmentblog.com. The original website died in a few days because the hosting was never renewed, so I managed to save the site in the nick of time.

As I write this now, in July 2026, I have hosted the website for two and a half years. It is hosted out of pocket purely to preserve Jon’s work, with respect for his wishes.

The site going down without me noticing it for a while made me realize something: everything on the internet is impermanent. Sooner or later, I too will be dead, and where will mine and Jon’s works be then?

This is why I have decided to turn all of his articles into books, segregating them into categories of various topics (they will be ready in the next 2 weeks or so).

Books of this type need a foreword, and as I was writing the foreword, and I broke down into tears.

It’s been 2.5 years, and I thought I was over it, but I suppose human loss is something we can never actually get over.

We are all mortal, and we all die, both the wretched and the blessed, the rich and the poor, the virtuous and the unvirtuous.

We are all unequal in life, but in death we are all equal. It is the great equalizer. We are all short lived.

“This Too Shall Pass”

I do not know what caused Jon to do what he did.

Drugs? Heartbreak? Some financial loss I wasn’t aware of? Depression? Who knows. At least, I don’t know.

But if I could tell him something, I’d tell him that whatever it is, it too shall pass.

Everything in life is temporary.

All good things and all bad things.

If you are going through hard times, remember that IT TOO WILL PASS. Just make sure that you do your part and KEEP GOING.

Bad times are to be expected in life, because absolutely NO ONE has only good times in their life.

The ancient Greeks believed that the gods gave men a drink before they were born.

The gods had two containers, one with wine (good things), and one with water (bad things).

There were some people who the gods gave a mix of wine and water. Such men would face both fortune and hardships.

There were some people who the gods gave only water, and such men were condemned to a life of misery and suffering. (The implied third drink of just wine and no water, is reserved only for the gods, and never offered to humans.)

The world is full of the latter, and is the reason why no one wants to take the Ovarian lottery and risk becoming a sex slave or an uneducated menial laborer working 14 hours a day making bricks by hand (yes the pictures in that article are real and taken by me).

Fortunately, all of us reading this are from the former group who got the mix of wine and water.

We have an education, enough money to be able to pay for a phone, and we have an internet connection, the greatest money making platform in the world.

You will have good times, and you will have bad times. The good times will pass, as will the bad times.

Life is a 30,000 day journey (if you’re lucky) and sooner or later you will meet your maker.

So enjoy your good days, and prepare for your bad days.

The First Law of Holes: If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

In your bad times, the very first thing you need to do is stop making the problem worse.

This is obvious when I put it in writing, but humans have an abandon ship mindset where they tend to make problems much worse before they decide to solve them.

I noticed this when I released Live Intentionally: 90 Day Self-Improvement Program, which has made over 13,000 sales and changed thousands of lives for the better.

There were some guys who would do the program for a few weeks, and see great results.

They would see their body fat start to melt away.

They would see new muscle grow and their friends would compliment them.

They would start waking up on time, stop wasting their energy on internet pornography, and become much more focused and disciplined individuals (I am very proud of the fact that my program helped many people quit smoking and drinking for good).

But then one day they would screw up something. Maybe they overate and had a cheat meal, or maybe they smoked a cigarette, or maybe they gave in and watched some porn, or something else.

What would proceed would be a full day of extreme bingeing on all the things they were trying to curb.

They’d eat a lot, spend the entire night watching porn, etc. and become their old selves again for a while before they got back on track with the program.

Why does this happen?

Because the human mentality is: “I’ve already failed for today. Might as well do more of what I did now, because I’m already going to have to re-do this day whether or not I do more of what I did.”

This was only solved when I released the second edition of Live Intentionally: 90 Day Self-Improvement Program that explicitly warned people about this natural tendency.

When people KNEW that their mind would try to trick them to dig a small hole deeper and deeper, they were able to control themselves.

As a result, a small mistake remained a small mistake, and they were able to come out of the 90 day program as changed men.

You have to understand... no matter how hard of a time you’re having in your life - JUST STOP DIGGING. Do not make it worse.

If you lost a lot of money gambling, do not borrow money from a loan shark to gamble even more hoping to make it all back (you won’t).

Don’t make it worse.

Stop Regurgitating Your Emotions. Make a Plan And See it Through.

Most things in life can be progressed with two simple steps.

1. Make a plan

2. See it through

What most guys do when they have tough times is that they start to wallow in their own misery.

They keep regurgitating their emotions and keep asking “why me” or “What did I do”, which is fine at first, but you have to remember what I told you when I started this article:

As a man, you simply do not have the luxury to not be able to manage your own emotions. Women and children can cry at will. Men must do what is necessary.

Sit and plan how you can improve your situation.

Act as if the past does not exist.

It is just the backstory of a video game. The real game begins today, and you have been given your present situation, all your skills and resources and connections to play with for the rest of your life.

I promise that you can do well with your current starting point.

And that people with worse starting points than you have also done really well.

And that people with much better starting points have done very poorly.

Most problems in life call for a bit of resourcefulness and creativity.

Use your brain to make a plan.

Then take action and execute the plan.

I guarantee that you will go much further than the guys who keep complaining and crying about how hard their life is.

Because the most important thing in life is MINDSET.

Control your mindset, and do the work that is necessary, and eventually you will be past the bad times and into good times again.

There is light at the end of the tunnel.

It too shall pass.

- Harsh Strongman

Before we even begin to talk about what traits to look for in a woman and why, you need to understand the female situation and why they are how they are.

If you do not understand their life situation, you will make the classic mistake of trying to find a woman who operates like a man (more logical than emotional, etc. – see Part 1)

Men and women have different evolutionary constraints and this has affected our development differently.

Nature gave women the great responsibility of producing babies, and much of the female evolutionary history is affected by this very fact.

The Special Burdens of Women

Unlike men:

1) Women spend 9 months producing a baby and invest a lot of energy to make it happen.

The process consumes about 70,000 calories and had a high risk of death for a long time before modern medicine showed up.

Given the high investment women make into a baby, they have evolved to care very much about their baby’s well being and survival.

Mothers will put their lives on the line to protect their children, and this is true for many other species, not just humans.

2) Women depend on others for care and provision for a few months after childbirth.

They need care not just for themselves but also for the baby. They also require additional food and water to produce milk to feed their babies.

They are unable to have sex with men for some time after childbirth, so they need to find people who will supply them with care and provisions despite not getting sexual intimacy in return.

If they cannot find care and provision, they are likely to die along with their baby.

3) Women have always been at risk of rape and sexual violence both from members of their own community and outsiders.

Historically, men who would defeat another group of men in battle would take their women for themselves.

This whole “kill the men and take their women” thing was so pervasive for so long that if you go back long enough in your genetic history, you will find that many of your female ancestors were raped by their captors, and you descend from the rape baby.

In the present day, women are more likely to get sexually assaulted by people they know (e.g. by elder cousins) than by others.

Women were historically always at risk for sexual assault and rape.

The Special Burdens of Men

I’ll keep this section short and only cover what is relevant to this series.

By and large men compete among each other for women.

Women generally decide who they have sex with (unless their men are unable to protect them and get raped), and it is guaranteed that the baby they make will have their genes.

Men on the other hand cannot make babies and thus need to find a willing or unwilling female to have sex with.

They are all competing with each other for sexual rights over the women around them whether they are aware of this or not.

The competition is social, physical, and sexual.

Physical: The men of one group can attack and kill the men of another group. They will then proceed to rape and sexually enslave the women of the losing group.

Social: A man with higher social status (resources/respect/power/etc.) is more likely to find willing women to have sex with him, because association with a high status male increases the woman’s own social status. (The king can make his wife a queen, the queen cannot make her husband a king.)

Sexual: Men who are better at providing sexual pleasure (and other types of excitement and fun) to women are more likely to have women coming back to have sex with them again and again.

Why Women Operate so Differently From Men

Because men and women have had different reproductive burdens in our evolutionary journey, we have evolved different physical and behavioral traits.

1) Women evolved to be submissive while men evolved to be dominant.

Women not only depend on men for protection but are also at risk of rape and sexual assault from men.

Men have to protect their women from other men hurting them, but also compete among each other physically, sexually, and socially.

Women who were more submissive and deferent to men were more likely to find men willing to protect them and share resources with them.

Men who were more dominant were more likely to find women who would seek them for protection, resources, and sexual pleasure.

(Notice how male dominance over other men is almost always a function of their physical strength and size, their power in society and their bravery, and their sexual prowess. Telling a man that he is physically small, weak, powerless, wimpy, or has a small penis, is thought of as humiliating or insulting him.)

Women submit to men to ensure they get the most protection and resources for not just themselves but also their children, while men dominate women (and other men) because being more dominant means better chances of reproduction with more and better women.

This is a controversial thing to say (“women evolved to be submissive”) in modern society, but let me assure you that even the most vehement feminist enjoys aggressive and kinky sex more than she enjoys plain vanilla sex.

They enjoy being dominated (tied up, lifted up, held tight, etc.) while men enjoy doing the domination (there are exceptions, but this is the general trend). It is an expression of our evolutionary history.

2) Hypergamy.

Men compete with each other physically, socially, and sexually so they have the best chances of finding women to reproduce with.

Women on the other hand, did not need to compete in the same way to reproduce. Women decide who they have sex with, and men are usually happy to oblige.

(In modern society they need to compete with other women for the best men, but I’ll get to that later. Right now we’re talking about ancient times before strict monogamy was a thing. The society of these times will be covered in the next part of this series).

As such, it was always in a woman’s best interest to find a man who is better than her: Taller, stronger, higher social standing, more resources, etc.

Women can leverage the fact that they choose whose children they produce to bond with men better than themselves and thus get the most provisions and protection. It is the winning strategy, and over their evolutionary history, it has become hardcoded in them.

All women are hypergamous. The term means that women are sexually attracted only to men who are better than them. Better looking, taller, stronger, higher status, etc.

Men on the other hand are happy to breed and are much less picky. A rich high social status man will often marry a poor low social status woman, but the opposite is quite rare.

3) Resource seeking behavior.

Women depend on men to supply them with food and other resources when they are pregnant and nursing children.

It was life threatening for them and their babies for them to be long term bonded to a man who could not supply them with resources during this time.

This is why when it comes to picking a man for long term bonding, women have a strong preference for resource stability.

She will be willing to compromise on both a man’s looks and his physicality if it means securing resource stability.

A woman will say things like “I like John, and he is strong and handsome, but he does not have the earning potential I am looking for.”

Men on the other hand value beauty over resources, and will happily marry a poorer woman if her poverty is adequately compensated by her beauty.

You will never hear a man say “I like Monica, and she is beautiful and fair, but she does not have the earning potential I am looking for.”

4) More emotional attunement.

Women are physically weaker than the men around them and cannot force their wishes onto them. They need to be more strategic and diplomatic to get what they want.

Also, they are required to take care of babies who cannot express themselves by speaking. They must be able to understand what their baby needs from his cues and body language.

Women have evolved to be far more emotionally attuned than men and the average woman has much better social skills than the average man.

They are able to “read the room” better, understand people’s emotions better, and have a better instinct for people’s body language.

Men on the other hand are more overt and rely on words rather than cues and body language (this evolutionary difference is why men end up having “it was not what you said, it was how you said it” type arguments with women).

5) Less ability in other skills (like humor).

Women do not need to compete with others to reproduce their genetics.

This means that they have far less selection pressure than men do for many traits and thus have less development in many abilities compared to men.

Women have lower spatial awareness than men.

Women have lower “extreme” IQs than men.

Most geniuses are men (and also most of the homeless are men). Women have a higher chance of being around the mean.

Women are worse at humor than men.

Humor is a trait men use to climb the social hierarchy and also to impress women.

Men need to be funny to get women (to lighten the mood and establish comfort, etc. before they seduce).

Women don’t need to do any of this… all they have to do is play along.

This is not to say that women cannot be funny or have no humor, it’s just that they are worse at it than men are, simply because they have no biological reason to evolve to be better at it.

Women have lower stress tolerance than men. Women rank higher on neuroticism than men do.

In all ancient societies, the safety of women is valued far more than men because they are necessary to ensure the survival of the society (generally men are considered disposable).

Much of the risky hunting and exploration was left to men, while women did the relatively safe task of gathering. And we have been hunter gatherers for millions of years.

Men have thus evolved to handle stress and uncertainty far better than women can.

Women are more capable of dissociation than men are.

Along the same lines, women have always been exposed to some degree of rape and sexual violence.

When a tribe gets conquered, the men are killed and the women are taken as “wives”.

Women have evolved to be able to disassociate from their reality (e.g. getting raped) as a defense mechanism and survival skill.

Women who could disassociate when they were getting raped by conquering men and take on a new identity afterwards (actually become like a wife) were less likely to get killed for resisting or to commit suicide after the fact, and thus more likely to survive i.e. this trait gets passed on.

Dissociative identity disorder (DID), previously known as multiple personality disorder (MPD) is diagnosed 6–9 times more often in women than in men

Women are more risk averse than men.

Women are always at risk of rape and sexual assault. They also have to make sure their pregnancy succeeds, and their children survive.

They have thus evolved to be more cautious and more risk averse than men.

It is simply their evolutionary reality.

Again, nothing in this piece “always applied all the time” and there are plenty of exceptions. However the general trends are true and shape the differences between the sexes.

The reason I cover all of this is because lately I see tons of men getting upset about women not being the way they wish they were.

They become bitter about women being “less capable but still wanting more” but you have to understand… they are how they are because of the evolutionary realities they faced over the millions of years our genus Homo has been around.

You simply cannot expect them to behave like men.

There are better women and worse women, and this series will show you how to pick from the better women, but you have to remember that she will still be a woman.

If you expect her to behave like a man, you will only be disappointed.

In the next part, I will talk about why women are how they are, from a environment/cultural perspective.

Who you choose to marry is the MOST IMPORTANT DECISION you will ever make in your life.

Your life will change forever on the day you marry, and whether the change is for the better or for the worse depends on who you pick as your partner.

A good wife is an asset for life. She will serve you in every way, sexually and otherwise. She will nurture your house, create a positive environment so you look forward to coming home after work, and will be a good mother to the children she gives you.

On the other hand, a bad wife is a hassle and a liability for life. She will make your life hell. She will take far more than she gives and will make you not even want to go home after work.

She might even add legal complications to your life with divorce proceedings and might attempt (usually successfully) to take half of your net worth and a good percentage of your future income as alimony, maintenance, and child support.

Needless to say, this is a decision you need to make with patience, knowledge, and with your eyes open.

A lot of men, especially young men and those who lack life experience, think in terms of ideals. They have an ideal woman in their head and they want to marry her. This ideal woman usually holds the same opinions as him, behaves logically, and acts in a way that he approves of.

The problem with this is that… ideals do not exist in the real world. Only a fool makes his decisions based on ideals because ideals do not matter. The only thing that actually matters when it comes to decision making are real world options and the expected consequences of going with them.

Repeat after me:

IDEALS DO NOT MATTER. IDEALS DO NOT EXIST.

THE ONLY THINGS THAT MATTER ARE REAL WORLD OPTIONS AND REAL WORLD CONSEQUENCES.

The reason I want to begin with this is that many men simply have not learned this lesson, even if it sounds obvious.

They compare every woman they come across with the ideal woman in their head, and all women fall short because the ideal does not exist.

The only things that matter are the real world options available to you, understanding the consequences you can expect with each option you have, and picking the one that gives you the best possible outcome.

For example, if you live in a modern society, and you want a woman who:

• Is a virgin (or close)

• AND can cook

• AND is feminine

• AND is young

• AND is beautiful

• AND comes from a good and powerful family

• AND wants children

• AND is tall

• AND loves you with 100% devotion

• AND will sacrifice her dreams for you

• AND has high libido

• AND does not smoke and drink

• AND is very high IQ

• AND makes a lot of money

• AND has free time to spend with you whenever you want

• AND is frugal

• AND is logical more than emotional

• AND [whatever other trait you like]

…you have too many ANDs.

The probability that you will find a woman who exactly matches your ideal is zero percent. In fact, she does not exist. If you decide that you will only marry this perfect woman, you will stay unmarried forever.

In real life, you pick from the options you have, so you must PRIORITIZE which traits you value over the others. And you must understand the accurate consequences of the traits you pick.

For example, picking a docile and very shy woman seems like a good idea to many men.

However, when they marry them, they realize that many of these docile women are completely dependent on them for everything and cannot even handle basic tasks by themselves.

Some are ok with this, while others regret this decision because the woman not being able to handle basic tasks by herself means that they are responsible for every little thing.

Something not working around the house? YOU have to call the repairman and get it done. She won’t be able to do it.

In this series, I will tell you what traits to look for and what the expected consequences are, and what traits to avoid and why.

However, you are unlikely to meet a woman that fits everything in this series 100%. Some compromises will have to be made because the options available to you will never be perfect.

Where I see fit, I will also mention that the trait can or can not be compromised upon.

What You Can Never Have

There are some traits that often exist in most men’s image of the “ideal woman” that simply do not exist in the real world (or exist so infrequently that they practically do not exist).

Some of these are:

• Women who do not want to follow the female mating strategy. Because ALL women want to follow the female mating strategy to the extent they can. Their ability to execute it depends on their economic, social, legal, and cultural background.

• Women who will love you like your mother did (unconditional love). Simply the nature of romantic love. All romantic love from a woman is conditional. Do not bother looking for a woman who will “always” love you “no matter what”. They do not exist. Some women will stay loyally in love longer than others, but the runway is not infinite. If you do not meet her expectations of performance (conditions) for an extended period of time, she will eventually start to nag you, and at some point want to leave you.

• Women who value logic over emotion. Women like Esther Vilar and Ayn Rand exist, but they are simply extremely rare. The vast majority of women (more than 99.99% of them) value emotions more than they value logic, and you will see it in their behavior and how they communicate with you.

You can find highly intelligent women. You can find tall women. You can find women who come from very powerful families.

But if you look for a woman who reasons like men (logic over emotion), or a woman who loves you unconditionally, or a woman who does not follow the female mating strategy, you will keep looking for the rest of your life.

I know this is painful for many people, especially people who are younger and/or those who have less life experience. This is because they are more likely to chase ideals.

Regardless of your personal feelings and opinions, you must understand that ideals do not matter. Real world options matter.

You have to make the best choice from the options available to you, instead of looking for an ideal, and getting frustrated when no woman you meet seems to fulfill the criteria.

This series will be continued in part 2.

– Harsh Strongman

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